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Couples Therapy: Give Your Relationship a Checkup

Relationship Checkup Couples TherapyCouples Therapy: Give Your Relationship a Checkup

While couples therapy is commonly associated with relationships that are struggling, it can also be a useful tool in evaluating partnerships that appear to be functioning on a perfectly normal level. Even if you and your partner do not feel that couples counseling is currently necessary, meeting with a counselor and attending a few sessions is a simple, effective way to give your relationship a “checkup.” In this case, couples therapy is like preventative care. You get to address any potential problems before they become relationship threatening.

Objective evaluation Although every couple’s relationship is unique and individual, there can be value in meeting with a therapist to explore your relationship’s current standing. Often, we tend to view relationships through rose-colored lenses when we are in them—and it is only from third parties that we gain much-needed perspective and analysis.While there is no need to fix something that isn’t broken, your therapist can help you become aware of smaller, less obvious issues that may be contributing negatively to your relationship as a whole. Even couples who are perfectly happy can make improvements in their communication and attentiveness, which over time can lead to greater relationship satisfaction.Asking important questions 

When attending couples therapy, you and your partner have the opportunity to ask and explore many important questions about your relationship, and where you want to be in the future. Working with a therapist provides you with a safe environment in which to discuss these questions, and their respective answers.

In checking up on your relationship, consider the following broad questions:

  • Am I currently happy? What could I do to be happier in this relationship?
  • Do my partner and I have strong communication skills? How could our communication be strengthened and improved?
  • Are there aspects of our relationship I wish were different? Are these wishes realistic?
  • Does this relationship make me a better person? Am I helping my partner to become their best self?
  • Do I feel comfortable bringing up my concerns and questions about this relationship now and in the future?

The answers to these questions are typically complex, and the problems underlying them are not eliminated overnight. Couples therapy is not the be-all, end-all solution for every single marital problem. It is, however, a wonderful place to begin when you and your partner want to ensure you are on the same page, and on the right track.

Goal setting and measured progression

As you and your partner work together to evaluate and improve your relationship, couples therapy can help you set goals and measure your progress. Whether you decide to make large or small changes, counseling provides a structure and a system of accountability that can help you and your partner become the people you want to be, and build the relationship you want to build. A regular relationship checkup is important, but it is in vain if there is no follow-through and no change made.

Couples therapy also allows you to compare the past, present, and future as you attend sessions and iron out problems you want to resolve. Counseling is incredibly flexible. You and your partner can meet with a therapist at your discretion, and on your timetable. Counseling enables you check up and check in monthly, yearly, or once every decade—the frequency is entirely in your hands.

As you perform routine relationship checkups, do not discount the credibility of couples therapy, or the positive role it can play in successful relationships. Even when all seems to be going according to plan, make it a priority to evaluate your relationship and to truly understand your current situation. It can mean the difference between complacency and genuine happiness in the long run.

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